My glorious career
Inmate, to me: “YOU get your fucking FAT ASS down those stairs and get me some tylenol, NOW!”
What I said (calmly): “We’re done here.” I shut the cell door pass-thru and walk away, as the deputy locks up and the inmate continues screaming for my death and throwing things in her cell.
What I wanted to say: “I may be fat, but I can lose weight, and you’ll never lose your chronic and debilitating case of ‘crazy scumbag whore’. Not only is my fat ass going to be sleeping in its own bed tonight, but I think I’ll take some tylenol right now, just because I can. Bitch.”
That there’s funny. I don’t care who you are.
Comment by Angie R — Friday, July 29, 2005 @ 4:06 am
::laughs::
sweetie, that’s genius.
Comment by Dennis — Friday, July 29, 2005 @ 4:27 am
bitch, is right. And an id-yit to boot!
Comment by elsa — Friday, July 29, 2005 @ 5:19 am
And she(inmate) wonders why she has trouble making friends. hee hee hee. I think I will take a tylenol - because I can.
Comment by Monica — Friday, July 29, 2005 @ 7:06 am
Oh, you’re awesome. I need real life friends like you.
Comment by Lauren — Friday, July 29, 2005 @ 8:25 am
Hey, let her know I took a tylenol too. Just in support of you. ha ha.
Comment by RisibleGirl — Friday, July 29, 2005 @ 5:11 pm
Ah, yes… outside of the ambulance walls I was the picture of professional (ok, not always, but it sounds good), but inside, oh, how a few skanks wish they’d never called me a dyke. Ha ha!
Comment by Cranky — Friday, July 29, 2005 @ 8:10 pm
Going to bed now, and will take a tylenol to add to the overall Karmic retribution. (snork)
Comment by Keith — Friday, July 29, 2005 @ 9:44 pm
You are so raw.. and I dig that about you!
:)
Comment by momof2 — Friday, July 29, 2005 @ 10:02 pm
That’s how you do it, say it with sweetness.
Comment by Susan — Saturday, July 30, 2005 @ 10:09 am