Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Rant of the Day

Filed under: Rants - drunkenlagomorph @ 8:50 am

Open letter to a varitable potpourri of fucktards:

  • To the lady who cut in front of me in line at Starbucks this morning: I know you are a better person than me, and thus have more rights. But seriously, how do you stand your obnoxious self? You think some sense of shame would encourage you to do the right thing, if doing the right thing itself does NOT. I could tell from your no makeup, hair in a ponytail, and shorts that you were NOT worried about harming your career by being late for work. You know what bitch? Some of us do NOT have a man that buys our Suburban and our house and our clothes, and YES, our Starbucks. Some of us have to do this all by ourselves, so step the fuck off.
  • To most companies in the U.S.: Why do you refuse to promote from within on a regular basis? Sure, I may have no full-time project management experience, but I knew the product, have stellar sales experience, and I am smart. Youcould have taught me in 3 months everything I need to know. But instead you went outside the company. Thanks for letting me know that I would have forever been a peon if I had stayed at that job. Thanks for rewarding company loyalty with a dead-end job.
  • To the people who give me dirty looks when my dog is taking a dump: Do you not see this bag in my hand? I’m the only one in the entire neighborhood that picks up after my dog. Bite me. Oh, and I’ll have you know that I don’t leave my dog outside to bark 24 hours a day. In fact, my dog only barks about once every two weeks. He’s the best dog you’ll ever see. In fact, I’d rather have his company than yours, white trash. Go screw yourself.
  • To the idiot who cannot comprehend how to use that left turn lane: First of all, the left turn lane is a lane. It can fit your whole car, if you’d just give it a chance! Second of all, you are not a semi-truck making a tight corner. You don’t need to suddenly swing out to the right (and into my lane of traffic) so you can “clear” your left turn with your 2-door Acura.
  • To public restroom users: How flippin’ hard is it to turn around and make sure your flush is sufficient? I don’t want to see the size of the kids you dropped off at the pool, I don’t want to see the massive amounts of toilet paper you think it’s necessary to use, and most of all, I don’t want to know that you’re on your period. So take some responsibility for your own refuse and make sure the flush “took”!

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